An Epiphany, of sorts.

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I attend Weight Watchers.  I’ve been with Weight Watchers, on and off, for most of the past 30 years.  I’ve lost weight, and I’ve gained it back many times over those 30 years.  My husband, being a smart ass, says it’s because my goal has always been to lose weight, and when you lose something, you invariably find it again eventually and that I should try, instead, to get rid of it.  Ha!

That has absolutely nothing to do with the epiphany I had this weekend after the meeting!  The discussion at the meeting was about finding your ‘why.’  Now, your ‘why‘ has to be more than just wanting to be thin or wanting to look better in clothes or even simply wanting to be healthier; it has to be something that will hold you to your goal and help you stay the path when the going gets tough.  My ‘why,’ back in February, was to be alive for my kids in the coming years.

Around that time, I had laid in bed one evening and wondered if the pain running across my back and down my arm was my having a heart attack. I didn’t do anything about it and fell asleep instead.  Thankfully, I woke up the next morning and resolved to do better.  Over the coming months, even though I was failing at tracking my points, we all began eating better.  I’m not a fan of processed foods anyway.  I don’t cook with cans of soup, I make a roux and add wine! Ha!

Towards May, I started logging my points again, and I lost 16lbs before I stopped tracking.  I am terrible at tracking.  I hate it.  I don’t know why, I just hate it.   It’s now October, and I am still 16lb’s down and am very proud of that status quo.

Back to the epiphany.  My amazing leader, Deb, had us think about our ‘why‘ again and where we see ourselves in the future, and I saw myself where I wanted myself to be; somewhere high in the mountains, healthy and fit, looking out at some spectacular view.  That’s what I want.  In that moment, I realized getting there has nothing to do with my weight, and it has everything to do with my personal fitness.  If I can maintain without doing anything in the way of exercise, I can lose weight just by getting my backside out of my chair and moving more.

On Tuesday, I did 30 lengths of the pool.  I did the same on Wednesday, and this morning I had an appointment with a trainer at the YMCA who set me up with a workout plan.

Funny thing though, on Wednesday evening I went out with a big group of ladies to this lovely Italian restaurant for dinner and I didn’t want to eat anything heavy, so I ordered a salad.  I never order the salad. I only had two small slices of the bread too.  I did have a bite of my friend’s chocolate cake dessert too, but that’s okay.  I’m getting healthy.  I’m making better choices for my body. My goal is not to be thin, but to be strong and healthy. I want to feel strong again!  I’d love to get thin as a side effect of being healthy, but my goal is longevity through health and fitness!!

So, that was my epiphany.

Featured image by Caleb Frith on Unsplash

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Kerry

Kerry

Eccentric Mother, Loving Wife. Addicted to creating all kinds of everything!

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About Me

Wife. Mother. Artist. Maker. Realtor. Born in the UK. Home in the US. A Husband. Two Children. Two Dogs and Three Turtles. My Stories. 

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